“Three wishes?”
“Yes, Master, you have three wishes. You own the lamp, yes?”
“Yes, I do.”
“And you rubbed the lamp, yes?”
“Yes, while I was cleaning–it was my great grandfathers, he was famous, but had a horrible–”
“And so I am your Genie, you are my Master, and you have three wishes.”
“And I assume that I cannot wish for more wishes or anything else like that?”
“Yes, Master.”
“Did Disney get that from you, or did you get that from Disney?”
“Walter Disney got that from me when he owned this lamp, Master.”
“Who else has owned this lamp, Genie?”
“Quite a couple people, Master. Marilyn Monroe, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, James Marshall Hendrix, just to name a few of them, Master.”
“Interesting. Hmmm… OK, Genie, I know what my first wish is.”
“Yes, Master, I am listening.”
“All of those names, including my great grandfather, all ended up badly. Thus, I can see that you obviously twist wishes around. And, so I have to be careful about how I phrase my wishes to you. Is this correct, Genie?”
“I grant the wishes as they are and not as they ought to be, Master.”
“Right, then, Genie, my first wish is this: I wish that you grant my last two wishes based on my intentions when wishing these wishes and not on a literal translation of the wish, and any ambiguities are to resolve in my best interest.”
“Yes, Master, it is done.”
“Next, I wish that I have all the tools to make, change and influence the world however I want it to be.”
“Yes, Master, it is done.”
“Finally, I wish that I have the ability to make, change and influence the world however I want it to be.”
“Yes, Master, it is done. You are now God.”