Tag Archives: dreams

Bad Connection

“Of all the things that I regret,” she sighed, “I regret letting go the most. It was my choice, after all, but once made, you can’t take it back. You can’t go back. After walking the Dreamlands, the Slow World loses its shine. It is dull and cold, weighted like lead in water while I am used to floating across glimmering infinity. You just can’t go back after knowing what that feels like.”

She sighed again and took a long, slow sip of a luminescent tea before her on the table. Her eyes were unfocused and slid around the room, never quite focussing on anything in particular.

A man sat before her, cyborg-fingers fluttering across a holographic keyboard as he documented everything that he saw like some sort of journalist. He nodded at the glowing tea and, despite her glazed eyes continuously shifting, she smiled vaguely and replied.

“Jacking directly into your Conduit and the enhanced stimulation of your nervous system dehydrates you. You have to replace the spinal fluid as well as vitamins, minerals and other stuff. Do you know how most Dreamers die?”

Her eyes snapped into focus and looked directly at the man. Her eyes were eerily light-blue; apparently, eye color was lightened by long-term abuse of the Dreaming app. He seemed to shift, uncomfortable under her direct gaze and shook his head.

She smiled sadly, a glimmer of her old-self there. She had been beautiful once, long before the abuse had eaten into her body. And, as quick as it had appeared, it retreated and her old-self was gone again leaving behind the husk of a human that she had become.

“Dehydration,” she stated coldly, almost entirely detached from what she was saying and how it was relevant for her, “Eventually the Slow World is too much to bear and the Dreamer puts off disconnecting longer and longer and longer… Eventually, the Dreamer taps out as their spinal fluid burns away and their body dies of thirst. The last part of the body to die is the mind.”

She took another sip of the glowing beverage and the corner of her mouth curled upwards. She put the cup down and absentmindedly wiped her hand off on her dress as if the object were somehow dirty.

“It is hard disconnecting,” she sighed, “Very hard coming back to the cold, slow version of reality.”

The man nodded, his extended, spidery-fingers silently fluttering away.

“Do you know about Limbo?” she started, her eyes locking with his again, “There is a moment in the Dreamlands where the Dreamer is aware that they will never wake up again. Their body is dead but their mind has not yet passed. It lasts for about six minutes of Slow Time. They know that this will be their final dream and–do you know what most of them do?” she asked smiling and leaning forward, her unnaturally light eyes suddenly feverish in their intensity, “Do you know what they say happens to the Dreamers in Limbo?”

“No, I don’t,” the man monotones, his cyborg fingers pausing in mid-air, “What do you think happens?”

“Well, time, obviously, doesn’t move at the same pace in the Dreamlands as it does in the Slow World,” she started recounting, detached again, her eyes sliding across the room, unseeing as she spoke, “So the six minutes where the body is dead and brain is dying can feel like an hour or a day or, perhaps, even longer in the Dreamlands. No one really knows, as the Dreamland app isolates brain-body disconnections and puts them in a secure socket layer. Probably a good thing or else the Dreamlands would be littered with corpses, and that would not really be all that fun to upload yourself into… Anyway, I have a theory. Wanna hear it?”

The man nodded, his fingers pausing in mid-air.

“I think those in Limbo relive their own versions–” she paused and raised her hands to her face, then outstretched her arms and her eyes focused on her fingertips, “It is cold. My fingers are going cold. Why are my fingers going cold?”

The man smiled and nodded. Suddenly she noticed how he has no distinguishing characteristics. Where was this room and how did she get here?

The piercing coldness in her fingertips was creeping up her hands, and then her arms. Her legs were frozen now too. The room’s details were beginning to get fuzzy and the image of the man began to blur and swirl into a soup of pixels before her very eyes.

“Oh, god,” she heaved, as the coldness entered her chest, began to crawl up her neck and towards her brain, “Oh-my-god, I am in Limbo, aren’t I? Aren’t I!

She could hear herself screaming but there was no air in her frigid lungs anymore and the ice was seeping into her brain…

The pixelated-AI’s fingers stopped fluttering, he smiled vaguely and nodded. He then tilted his head to the side and spoke to someone or something not present in that room:

Account, Diana Rothshaw #1087752, closed and the Dream Rental Contract is duly terminated. Cause of account closure is Fatal Cerebral Collapse and the Dreamland Fun Corporation notes both its sadness at the client’s passing and its indemnity in this matter. The client’s signed disclaimer discharging the Dreamland Fun Corporation of full responsibility in the event of application abuse–which was obtained upon account opening–is attached to this file. This recording notes that it was the client’s own choice–attached wav-file where client admits this–despite the noted and communicated risks involved with the repeated use of the Dreamland application. Upload complete. Severing secure socket layer and formating Conduit connection. End.

And then the room was empty.

Dangerous Playgrounds

When all was said and done, he still felt shitty about the whole thing. He knew he was saving the world, but he was also stealing, hiding and sneaking all around. He alone carried the Orb, hiding it from the Dark Lord. This burden was so heavy that only a few close friends in class could he share this with. But they had all just looked at him like he was crazy, and so he stopped telling people. Not even his family knew what was in his school bag, and he began realizing that he was all alone.

In fact, he woke up one morning and realized that he had pretty much stopped talking altogether.

He ate his cereal, drank his orange juice and packed his lunch into his school bag. It was in there, staring cold and metallic right back at him. He waved goodbye at his mom and dad. He was not sure if they saw him. He had been carrying the Orb for so long, perhaps, that he had gotten just a little too good at sneaking around.

The school bus picked him up outside their house. It was yellow, like an elemental of light. He sat right at the back. He felt safe inside the bus. But, all too soon, that bus drive was over and he had to walk into school. This was the most dangerous moment each day. He felt so vulnerable out here. The crowds of kids and noise swarmed around him on the playground. Enemies could attack from any angle, but he would not see them coming. The Dark Lord’s assassins could shoot any arrow into his back or sneak a snake along the ground to bite him…

He started walking then running and, eventually, he was sprinting across the playground to get inside. His heart was pounding in his chest. He ran past a group of girls and heard them giggle. He had to get to the library or the toilet, somewhere small, safe and hidden.

And then the bell went.

He felt the assassin’s arrow wing by his ear. A soft and deadly whoooosh. The Sun darkened a bit and the world suddenly slowed down. They knew where he was. His legs felt like lead. He could not move. He was screaming inside. Screaming. He had to move. He alone carried the Orb, hiding it from the Dark Lord…

In this moment, he knew what to do.

He was nearly inside the school building, but he turned around. The playground was moving inside, throngs of shuffling kids were all slowly walking inside. The Dark Lord was always out there somewhere and his assassins were hidden in the trees, under the bushes, and in the crowd.

He was done running. He was done hiding and carrying this secret all alone. He was done being silent and scared. He was done saving the world and being pushed in front of in the cafeteria queue or having his food stolen.

He flipped his bag around in front of him. He unzipped it and reached inside the inside apartment, where the Orb was hidden. It was cold and metallic. It always felt heavier than he expected. He was ready for a fight. He knew there was no going back, but he also knew that this was all that he could do.

He took the Orb out of the bag and held it before him.

Everything was silent for a moment, and then the kids started screaming.

***

The TV news flashed to the onsite reporter. It was a lady with blonde hair, touching her earpiece and currently wearing a confused, surreal expression.

“Thanks, Bill,” she began speaking, her tone of voice just a little too high pitched, “Uhm, yes, I am at Weatherly’s Highschool. Behind me the paramedics are dealing with the injured kids–two school teachers and a bus drive are all hurt as well. At this stage, we do not think that there were any casualties, but the extent of the chaos has also made any detailed accounts uncertain.”

She smiles and turns to her right. The camera pans to a police sergeant’s face.

“Captain Reynolds,” the reporter introduces him, “You were first on scene. Can you please describe what exactly happened here?”

The police officers looks at her and then the camera. He hesitates, his eyes wide open. A sirens blasts in the background as red and blue lights flash through the scene.

“Uhm, Ma’am, I–I’ll tell you what I radio’ed in…” he begins, talking slowly, but then it all begins to pour out, “The kids were all running away from this other kid. You know, the school shootings. They are terrible, and so I am thinking I must stop this. But there is this light and then things are attacking. Things. You know, like those sort of things you see out of the corner of eyes at the bottom of the garden late at night, but you never tell anyone about them because they won’t believe you. Those things. They attacked. And this kid, standing right up on the steps has this thing, this other thing, in his hand. Light and stuff! And, and, and…”

The policeman runs out of words and his voice fades away. He nods at the bewildered reporter, and reporter turns back to the camera to conclude her report.

“And there we have it, Bill. Weatherly’s Highschool was attacked today. While this remains speculation, the immediate threat has been resolved. But, and I cannot stress this enough, the Dark Lord still remains undefeated and lurking out there, just in reach of our nightmares. What is he looking for? Why won’t he leave us alone? Who knows. Right back to you, Bill.”

And then the TV cuts back to the studio.

When the World Ended

We had retreated into the bowels of the same Earth whose landscape we had consumed, burnt and destroyed. The surface of the planet was no longer habitable, but we survived buried deep underground in concrete, neon-lit tunnels. These man-made tunnels stretched for miles with cold walls and a heavily guarded route back to the apocalyptic surface.

The same Governments that had taxed the surface’s destruction now protected us in these tunnels by the brutal enforcement of laws, strict and unwavering rules and constant paranoia. Governments would kill their people over scarce resources in the name of their people. Rebel gangs would mutiny and kill the Governments and rival gangs. Races would kill each other, neighbours would murder each other, and feuds would take whole tunnels in as the Government’s guards beat and executed people indiscriminately and then confiscate what little they had.

Violence and death permeated those cold, concrete tunnels deep in the Earth.

We knew the world was ending. We knew that the planet was fast approaching its shelf-life. The scientists had even worked out various estimates for when this would happen. But, in the meantime, we all barely survived the violence and oppression of life in those tunnels. There was little of beauty in our self-imposed prison.

And then came the announcement over the crackling intercom throughout the tunnels: “The world is ending at two-thirty today. This is in half an hour. Have a nice day. Thank you.

After this announcement, the graffiti-covered tunnel I was standing in went absolutely silent. I stood, my heart beating in my chest. I could hear and feel every breath I was taking and the flickering neon light overhead suddenly seemed unbearable. Everyone was silent. Everyone was absorbing the news; gangster, Governments and common folk alike.

And then the world changed dramatically, for thirty minutes.

Police, soldiers, guards and enforcers put down their weapons. They put away their batons and shields. They took off their helmets. They apologised to the people in front of them, shook hands–some even hugged–and they went back along the winding tunnels to their wives, children, lovers, friends and family. The gangs and rebellions all stopped, enemies spoke and then went on their way while thieves walked passed unguarded unlocked ration stores. Straining lovers fell to the ground, tearing off their clothes in the throws of passionate intimacies, as complete strangers with no one left to love or talk to did the same.

In the moment that the world realised there was no future, all human construction of greed, hate, Governments, rules, laws, legacy, oppression, duty, responsibility and more, disappeared. We were just people. All of us were just people. Every single one of us was just a person spending their last thirty minutes of existence with other people that also had no future. In the end, people just want to be happy.

I began to walk. I stepped over tangled, naked lovers that lay where bloodied, beaten bodies had once fallen. I walked by tattooed gang leaders shaking hands with arch enemies that mere moments ago they were trying to murder. I passed Government facilities wide open, rations and medical supplies scattered everywhere and weapons cast aside. No one–absolutely no one–wants to work for someone else–especially an oppressive Government–in their last thirty minutes alive. I walked passed tears and laughter. I walked passed hugging and kissing, and talking and sharing. I walked passed love and, mostly, I walked passed the peace that we had never had while there had been a future to squabble over.

Almost like a dream that I had had before, I found my way through these tunnels bursting with beautiful scenes. At first, I did not know where I was going. I was stunned by the news and I was just mechanically moving. But then I realised where I was going and I began to pick up the pace.

I cut my way through the tunnelled, neon-lit living quarters. I zigzagged down the eerie, graffitied common areas. I then crossed over into what was previously heavily restricted–on penalty of death–Government tunnels. These tunnels were cleaner with no graffiti on the walls, but there was no one inside them. When all the people leave and go to their loved ones, there is no Government.

I did not need a map. I had come in this way, once. It was a long time ago, but I still knew my way back there. I passed weapon caches lying wide open. They were filled to the brim with death, but no one was interested in them. We would all be dead in about ten minutes or so. I passed a medical bay where all the doctors, nurses and patients had left. We were all terminal in this world now.

And then I entered the most heavily restricted area. Warning signs plastered the walls thicker than the graffiti in the common areas. Barbed wired hung heavy around here. Dust layered the floor and the air was dry and stuffy like a tomb.

No one had come this way for ages. Perhaps even years? Or decades?

I reached the iron cage that was the military lift to the ground. I lifted the cold, rusted gate and stepped inside. Before I pushed the button, I stopped and listened for a moment.

It was silent. Absolutely silent. There were no gunshots or shouting. No sirens or explosions. No warnings or propaganda over the intercom. No violence or hatred anywhere. Perhaps for the very first time in the history of mankind, we were all at peace with each other. There was no future to fight over anymore, so our entire species was now living in the present.

And then I pushed the button.

The military lift ground to life. The screeching of metal and lurching of badly-oiled gears lifted me slowly for miles towards the surface of the planet.

The surface was toxic and mere exposure to it would kill a man in hours. But I did not have hours and that did not matter anymore. I just wanted to see it. I wanted to see natural light. I wanted to see the sky. I wanted to see the Earth for the last time and breath real air in my lungs and feel real wind on my face.

The top of the military lift was a small square, open-air construction that offered me the ability to stand and look around. In a strange half-light–neither day nor night–the rolling, blackened Earth stretched out without character or life. Such was the destruction that we had collectively rained down on this innocent planet, that there was simply nothing left of it but ash and this ending.

Then I saw it. Slowly at first, like a sun rising–or, at least, what I think I remember a sunrise looked like. Except that it was white. The white light began on the far horizon. There was no centre to it. It did not rise in the sky, but grew in intensity and began to engulf the land as it grew brighter and brighter. I stood, breathing the poisoned, beautiful air and smiling. I was–perhaps the only living thing–witnessing the actual end of the world.

And, as the white light grew more and more blinding and then engulfed even me, I felt happy. I felt good. I felt at peace.

The Dream Eater

The Dream Eater

He knew he was dreaming.

The landscape felt both familiar and vague with no real details. He had no idea how he had gotten here or what he was doing. Somehow he was in his old classroom–the English classroom or was it the Math one?–and outside it was sunny with green trees. Somehow this was not strange, despite the fact that he was now forty and working in another country.

Yes, this was definitely a dream he thought to himself while he sat in his old chair.

“A-are you real?”

The question made him jump. It came from right next to him. How had he not noticed the strange little, goblin-looking creature sitting next to him in the classroom? Bare skin stretched tightly over a skull-shaped face with large child-like eyes all combined to inspire a strange combination of fear, revulsion and pity when looking at the little creature.

“Are you real?” the little creature asked again looking directly at him, grave near-comical concern over its ugly little face.

“Ye-um, no,” he paused before shaking his head, “This is a dream, none of us are real. I’m not real and neither are you.”

The little creature looked away. It almost looked sad and he felt a silly impulse to hug it. Before he could do anything it looked back at him. The classroom was getting dark. It was nighttime now.

“Are you sure you are not real?” the creature asked softly, almost threateningly showing some pointed, sharp teeth in its mouth, “I am certain I am real. How do you not know that what lies out there is not the dream? Why can’t this be real and the strange place you think you live in be the dream?”

Lightning began to streak in the sky outside. Shadows were rising up in the corners of the classroom with menacing eyes peering out from them. And, just as he was about to answer, the bell rang.

He woke up in his bed covered in sweat with his heart racing. He shook his head. He was sitting in his bedroom a million miles away from the classroom. He was forty years old and had long since left that school.

What a strange dream.

The next day dawned and he fell into the bustle of the weekday routine. All day, though, he could not stop thinking about the strange, goblin-like creature in his dream with its large, child-like eyes and pointy teeth.

In fact, as the day went on, he thought more and more about the creature. What a strange thought? What if he was currently dreaming now? What if this was the dream and at night when he fell asleep, he actually woke up in the real world? What if he was a teenager dreaming that he was a forty-year-old man? What if the creature was right and he was really there? What if all of this was not real? What if he was a child dreaming that he was an adult living in another city?

These thoughts had started as mental itches. But as he scratched them, they had gotten itchier. By the end of the day, sitting in traffic on the way home, these thoughts were starting to circle around and around in his head. By the time he opened the door to his small apartment open, the thoughts were all he could think of.

Faced with the dark emptiness of his apartment and life, he suddenly felt tired. He felt exhausted. He was completely drained of every ounce of energy. If this was a dream, he did not want to be in it anymore. It was a miserable dream and he wanted to wake up.

He collapsed on his couch in his living room. He could not even summon the energy to turn the light or the television on. He just slouched down into a crumpled heap on the couch and–in the growing darkness of evening–he drifted into a deep sleep.

“A-are you real?”

He was standing back in the classroom, only it was a little different. Perhaps it was the French classroom? Maybe the walls were a different colour or the room a different size? There was more detail in the room this time.

But none of that mattered, as the little creature with child-like eyes and pointy teeth stood before where he sat.

“Are you real?”

“Y-yes,” he stuttered, trying to desperately remember why he was here or where he had come from, “Yes, I am real. I know I am real,” and then he remembered the other dark, dreary dream and added, “I do not want the other dream! I do not!”

“Then if I kill you here, you will die,” the little creature whispered menacingly. He was suddenly aware of how he could barely move and how sharp the claws on the little fingers of this creature were. The hairs on the back of his neck were beginning to rise. A cold shiver ran down his spine.

“Y-yes, I th-think so,” he stuttered, barely able to move his mouth as a fearful paralysis crept up his helpless limbs and his mind became blank.

“Goooood, goooood,” the little creature cooed wickedly, rows and rows of sharp, pointy teeth appearing in his mouth as it began to grin, “For I am the Dream Eater, liberating the sleepers from their false dreams of light and life. Come, let me show you the true dreams of darkness and death…”

A gurgling sound rose up from his throat as he tried to scream, but could not. He could not move, his limbs did not exist. His mind was frozen and the darkness was closing in. The classroom suddenly looked terrifying. Flashing lightning and pounding rain sounded outside, as the Dream Eater floated closer and closer to him with its sharp, pointy teeth becoming all he could see…

The police found him two days later when a family member called them. He had not shown up for work for two days without notice. Work had then called the family and his brother who lived in the same city. After numerous calls and no answers, his brother had come over to see if he was alright and had not been able to get into the apartment. It was then that his brother had called the police, who had kicked the door down in the attempt to see if he was alright.

He was not alright.

He was curled up on the couch. He was pale white like the very life had been sucked from him. His eyes were wide open and glassy, like a blind man. Most terrifying, though, was his face. It was contorted in a silent scream that no one in this dream had heard.

For this is how the Dream Eater hunts and that is how the Dream Eater feeds.

Good night, sleep tight and don’t let the Dream Eater bite.

Running

"He had to keep moving."

The gravel crunched under his feet as he ran. Each impact was heavier than the last. His breath came in desperate, reaching gasps that roared in his ears. The air felt like fire in his lungs. Despite each breath filling them to capacity, his lungs felt empty of oxygen and filled with fire that ran down to the lead in his weary legs.

Each step was harder than the last. Each breath more excruciating than the last. Each movement driven by sheer willpower pushing against the wall of pain. And so he kept going for what seemed like the entirety of existence.

He had to keep going.

Everything was quiet around him, except for the repetitive crunch of his feet on the road and his breathing in his ears. Everything was silent in the half-light, the Sun’s rays barely made it over the horizon and the sky was mostly dark.

But, far away, somewhere, somehow, there was something out there. A shapeless, formless horror was hunting him. Old and dark and deadly. It slithered and stalked and stank. It was tireless and endless in its pursuit, but he could run. He could keep moving. He had to keep moving.

Crunch. Crunch. Crunch…

He opened his eyes. The light from the crack in his curtain cut into his eyes and he blinked. Pushing himself partly up he glanced at the time beside his bed and groaned.

“That can’t be the time already,” he sighed, sitting up in bed and swinging his feet to the floor, “God, I’m tired! It feels like I’ve just ran a goddamn marathon!”

Infinite Dreams

old man in smoke

What if I told you that it was all true?

Everything.

What if every thought you ever had was true? What if every screaming fanatic’s religious belief was true? What if every twisted scientist’s theory was true? What if every dark murderer’s fantasy was true? Every hazy daydream, every fleeting prose, every miserably morbid thought, every optimistic hope…

All true.

Everything.

What if every being’s thoughts are the seed that births another universe? A parallel thought to the universe from whence it came. What if our universe was birthed by the thought of some distant other being that became our omnipresent god.

As our thoughts made us the gods of other universes.

How long does a thought last? If you dreamt of infinity, would you ever awaken from it? Well, you might, but the dream itself would feel like it went on for infinity. And, if felt like it went on for infinity, then it did.

There is no difference between perception and reality.

A reality is built on a three dimension scale with space on the one axis, time on the other and thought on the final one.

The thought that birthed our universe has not ended yet, but our thought birthing other universes that spin within that one. A dreamer dreaming of a dreamer dreaming of infinity that dreams of the dreamer dreaming…

What if I told you that it was all true?

What if I told you that I could prove it?

What if I told you that I did prove it…

For, if in this cocooned fleeting existence you think of the answer, it is the answer. The thought is the proof of the thought and we are the gods that drift lazily over oceans of existence birthing whole universes on pure whimsical impulse.

Who exists between the dreamer and dream? Perhaps both. While the one awakens from the other, the other’s existence overrules that of the former for the brief length of its existence.

Ssshhh…

I am about to awaken and this dream will end. Soon the universe in which you are reading this will no longer exist, but mine will. And mine will exist until our dreamer that dreamt us awakens from his dream.

How long is a thought?

Such a question misses the beauty of perspective, for surely, it is more important that a thought and a dream existed than for how long it did so?

My eyelids are flickering. Good morning! I am leaving. The light will strike me through the curtains as my mother lets the daylight in or my alarm clock goes off or the dogs next door start barking or the farmyard cock begins to crow… Maybe a plane will fly over or soldiers will attack our trenches? Who knows what is left for me outside of this dream, but right now—

Right here.

In this dream.

Now.

You are beautiful.

You are beautiful and I want you to know that. This room is beautiful, this place, this time, space and thought… The gold of the light above and the blue of endless skies hold you and carry you to the heights of infinity.

Infinity!

I… I must go.

Honey, wake up…

Just—just, if you want me, if you want to live again, just think of—